Bureau of Meet Cute10,000 words written so far (about 26% complete)
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AREN'T EVIL INTERLUDES JUST THE BEST?

Posted on March 29, 2016

While the main narrative in Here Is Where I . . . is told from Gideon Thump's first-person perspective, I opted to feature several scenes checking in with the bad guys. All I had in my head at the start of this chapter, the first of these sinister scenes, was a tiny creature running to deliver a cell phone to his master. The details of him performing his services in order to win back his soul, the delightful way the imp's physical description slips into place, and the history Telax shares with several of the established heroes all fell into place organically and with quite a creative rush. Here's the chapter in its first, unedited outpouring:

Chapter 19

Obligatory Interlude that Checks In With the Inevitable Evil Threat Thus Creating Some Narrative Tension for Our Unsuspecting Cast


The tiny imp, no taller than a ceramic garden gnome, races down a dark corridor, intent on presenting his cumbersome cargo to his master.

Telax has travelled through numerous dimensions, weathered run-ins with gaggles of Shatter Ghouls, and wiggled out of a heated dispute with a Blizzard Banshee to bring his master such an advantage. He undertook the quite roundabout trip back to prevent the despicable heroes of Earth from sniffing out his trail

The imp holds contempt for the bratty goddess the most. He touches the scar marring his chest, the result of dancing too close to her twin blades. The witch has too much of her father's warrior spirit in her. It gives him slight comfort that she can no longer visit with her father. He knows she blames him for this but doesn't care. She and her fellow immortal have never caught him. But the one called Scott Holloway is no more. Not that anyone celebrates his passing. His master had known that Gideon Thump would step in. His master's reach even stretched to those who worked the threads. One of the fates reluctantly did his master's dirty work when push came to shove. She had given up Gideon's role weeks ago.

Telax knows he is one of many assisting his master. A major reason he stays in good graces with his master is how slippery he is. Twice he has evaded capture. More than you can say for poor Gnash. The noxious henchmen had been the master's right-hand man since the Infernal Uprising. With him gone, a victim of the changeling's ever-shifting elemental abilities, Telax is now favored.

His whiskers are all atingle and not because his preferred prey, a stone otter, is nearby. No, not much gets him stoked anymore what with his master having taken his soul away for safekeeping. So very little gets his emotions stirring anymore. Telax misses his soul. His dainty antlers never drooped when he had a soul. His now blackened scales use to be a radiant blue. Overall, he had more pep in his step and punch to his battering ram spiked tail when he was whole.

Not that he blames his master; Telax is much more focused and mission-minded without a pesky soul. He can do horrible things and endure horrors that would've made his old self squeamish and prone to losing his lunch.

And he never likes missing a meal, even one already partially digested. Another delicious advantage―how utterly ruthless he now is at his favorite game, checkers.

The steadfast imp hoists his delivery up over his head once again, being careful not to brush his long, crooked ears against the device's touch-sensitive surface. It should be his master's honor to swipe the phone's screen and be the first to see the glorious app Telax has commissioned a wretched mortal from the Beach of Myrtle in the Carolinas to design. An App that will help them destroy the one called Gideon Thump, the sole obstacle to his master's remarkable plans and the return of Telax's soul. If Telax's soul had been with him when he'd given the App designer his reward, he would've like not attempted dealing death by innocuous thumb drive. His soul would've lodged a protest at delivering such a prolonged a painful demise.

Telax pictures the yellow urn holding his soul. His master keeps it on the topmost shelf among the souls he holds in high regard. As much it's an honor to have his soul shelved alongside the likes of Bilgerourke the Contemptible and Lady Nan of the Crimson Mist, Telax desperately wants to be reunited with his conscience.

He knows that if he succeeds, his decades of servitude will finally be over and he will be allowed to return to his family's catacombs and resume a life that has been put on hold for so very long. The immobilization spell the master blanketed his family with has them frozen in time, awaiting his return. Telax wishes to return to his home and finally wrest control of the family's destiny from his obsolete father. It's an imp's birthright to take down their parent and assume the role of patriarch. He would be granted many wives with that simple act. He smiles, exposing his yellowed and chipped teeth.

Bring his master utter victory and then a return to his former life where he has tantalizing options. Telax races down the corridor, fairly glowing at his prospects.

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