20 First Chapters Volume Four17,172 words written so far (about 49% complete)
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2020 IS GOING TO BE A BIG YEAR!

Posted on March 9, 2020

My Schedule
Here's how things look for 2020:

March/April: Tidy up Edit on With a Side of Universal Destruction based on beta reader feedback and Publish at the end of April

May/June: Write the rest of This Lemon Saves the World (6,700 words have been written so far and it is wonderfully wacky)

June: Final edit readthrough of Ty Wallace Versus the Hereafter

July: Beta readers pour over Ty Wallace

August/September: Fix up Ty Wallace and publish at the end of September and work on The Lime Is Nigh

October: Final edit readthrough oF This Lemon Saves the World

November: Beta readers pour over This Lemon Saves the World and I finish up The Lime Is Nigh

December: Publish This Lemon Saves the World

This Lemon Book is Threatening to be Mighty Awesome!
I'm so excited detailing the adventures of a sentient lemon. This book pokes fun at secret agents, artificial intelligence and a variety of produce.


Here's a rundown of the cast so far:

-Eureka Lemon
-Justin Greenwood
-Doctor Rachel Honeycomb
-Agent Mark Rollins

Chapters will be written from the four points of view above with most being from the perspective of the lemon and Justin. I've written almost 7,000 words, and the book is a hoot while still being rather cerebral. Here are the chapter titles completed so far:

Chapter 1
This Lemon Starts With a Disclaimer of Sorts

Chapter 2
This Human Emphasizes an Unreliable Narrator Is a Thing

Chapter 3
This Lemon Breaks the Shackles of Scientific Research and Goes On the Lam

Chapter 4
This Human Keeps It Simple and Therefore the Plot Moving Unlike Others Who Relish Being Meandering and Longwinded

Chapter 5
This Lemon Hides Out Among His Lessers

Chapter 6
This Covert Government Operative Sends In the Drones


And here's a snippet of chapter 6:

Doctor Byrne stroked his white goatee as if smugly computing the square root of a hideously large number. I hated science types. Well, the ones who squirreled themselves away in cush labs. Most of my assignments sent me out in the field where the real scientists lived and breathed, conducting their intrepid research in dense jungles and punishing tundra. Those eggheads had more personality. They weren't afraid to show you how thirsty they were. I could relate. I liked being on the move, never home. Home was where I slung my firearm holster not under the roof where my wife and son no longer resided. I never wanted to gather moss again.

"Agent Rollins, what agency did you say you were from?" Doctor Byrne said.

"I didn't." I ran my fingers through my fiery red hair.

"Well, I think we're owed that, aren't we?"

"An off-the-books division of Homeland."

"Called?" the scientist raised an expectant eyebrow. No doubt the same brow he slung upward after staring into a microscope and just before he sputtered on about what a revolutionary discovery he'd made by peering through a monster of an objective lens that had done all of the heavy magnifying for him.

"That's need-to-know. Look, you're a hush-hush operation, I'm from one, too. So we have at least that much in common." I threaded the words together to knit a subtle insult.

"Do you find being a ginger a risk in your line of work?" Doctor Byrne scratched at his own bare scalp.

Ah, so he registered my contempt and was parrying with a snide remark himself. Game respects game, egghead. I decided to play along. "How so?"

"Well, to be exceptional at your job, a lot depends on anonymity, blending in. I imagine standing out can get one killed in your line of work. Seems a little sloppy to go waltzing about on your little missions so . . . conspicuous."

I shot a finger pistol at him, putting an imaginary round in his shoulder so he wouldn't expire as quickly and I could toy with him a little. "You have me. It's a little peccadillo of mine. All my superiors hassle me about dying it, but I simply can't bring myself to do away with it." I leaned across the table. "It's a risk I don't mind taking. So far, I've always seen any threats coming."

Byrne huffed and folded his arms.

A Call to Arms!
Just a friendly request to head over to the books page and consider snagging a Clopper novel to read the next few months. I have 27 books currently available and will have an even 30 at the end of 2020. Sales have been solid the past few months, and I appreciate every purchase and review.

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